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Try Things To Learn What You Actually Want

I often feel like I know exactly what I want.

But I’ve been learning more and more that I don’t really know—not until I’ve given it proper attention. Way more attention than I ever have before.

I can’t just guess what I want and expect to nail it on the first try. It takes time, reflection, and a bit of trial and error to untangle what I actually want.

It’s a process of refinement. Talking about it, meditating on it, researching it, and experimenting with it helps fine-tune my calibration—like tuning an old FM radio. Sure, 104.5 lets me kind of hear the music, but what I really want is K104.7—the way “Fireflies” by Owl City was meant to be heard.

Examples

I’ve got plenty of rated-R examples I could share, but since my parents and siblings are avid readers, I’ll spare them…for now.

A few months ago, I went to a Rangers hockey playoff game with my brother, Alex. Throughout most of the playoffs, our best player, Artemi Panarin, was struggling.

Frustrated, Alex shouted, “Do something, Panarin!” With this topic of radical specificity on my mind at the time, I leaned over and said, “Be more specific.” Alex adjusted: “Do something good, Panarin!” Then I took it a step further and said, ”Do something good for our team, Panarin.” Alex kept refining: “Do something good for our team this shift, Panarin!”

I shit you not—on the very next shift, Panarin made a beautiful pass that set up a huge goal. Ask Alex.

It was like the universe needed Alex and me to get crystal clear on what we actually wanted. And once we did, it was happy to deliver our desire.

Another recent example: I set an intention to fly in my dreams. I’ve heard it’s possible and wanted to consciously try it.

A few nights ago, it happened…except I wasn’t flying myself. Instead, I was playing a video game in the dream, and my character was flying.

Lesson learned, and I’ve adjusted my intention! No luck yet, but the universe works on its own time.

The only things any of us need to do are be clear on what we want, and trust the universe’s timing.

When we’re vague about what we want, we risk settling for something that only sort of resembles what we desire. But when we dig deeper, we refine and sharpen those desires into something real—something the universe can actually work with.

You probably have examples like this in your own life. Maybe it’s a goal that didn’t hit quite right or a decision that left you wondering if it was really what you wanted.

My advice? Try things. Talk them out. Pay attention. Adjust and readjust. This is how you learn what you actually want—not by waiting for a lightning bolt of clarity, but by refining your aim along the way.

P.S. Join me tonight (or any Thursday) for a yoga & breathwork session—I guarantee it’ll help you calibrate closer to your true desires.

😄 Funny Business

📊 Community Poll

Results for last week’s question: What do you do when a song you like is playing, but you don't know all the words?

YES, SING IT! Whatever “it” is. I love the confidence, everyone.

I’ll often intentionally make up my own words.

On to this week’s question…

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“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that things are difficult.” - Seneca